• At the first year in a university (1998) I do an exciting math discovery, funcoids (later (2019) I did a related discovery, ordered semigroup actions, see its economic evaluation in trillions of dollars).
• At the same time I was tortured and hungry, nobody fed me (this also prevented me to obtain a scientific degree and money).
• For a long time I tried to bless my enemies, but repeatedly when I tried to pronounce a blessing, I noticed that the phrase that I was going to pronounce turned out to be a curse. I found no blessing for these who don’t participate in publishing my math research. You may be a drunker, beat your children, liar, aggressive, etc. – I could pray for you. But if you refuse to participate (for example, by your money) in publishing ordered semigroup actions and discontinuous analysis – I can’t find mercy for you, because you choose not to support the entire mankind following instead your personal interests (that is consider yourself more important than 10 billion people).
• After many attempts to bless that turned out to be a curse, I decided not to follow Gospel commandments anymore, as an impossible task. Now I can curse, judge, or take a revenge.
• I started (2021) a lawsuit against mankind in God’s court. As expected and planned the defendant ignored the court (I mean that my lawsuit didn’t get a billion visitors on YouTube) and didn’t answer my accusation. I won in the court easily sentencing mankind to death.
• I realized that I am one of the two witnesses of God from Apocalypse. This means that God takes me with my girlfriend to a distant past to build the civilization of “gods” – the presence of God in the world.
• I realized the purpose of sufferings of mankind, to free place for gods: people would be an unjust competitor for gods like Gaza for Israel, if allowed to develop.
• I felt that because God is merciful, I should be merciful to mankind and partly forgave mankind, replacing complete death of all people (except of me) just with tortures.
• It was a right decision, because meditating about meaninglessness of people’s suffering in the God’s experiment over them led me to the idea that God is wrongly applied because we need to add to logic new inference rules. I successfully constructed the new inference rules.
• I realized that not only me will give glory to God (what means among giving glory itself, to bring God into the universe, build His copy), but also people of the Earth will give glory to God. That other people are capable of serving God seemed highly improbably, but now presence of God in the world changed thanks to addition of the rule of modeling to logic and God starts to manage everything including people in another way leading to better results.

So, suffering of mankind and my forgiveness were not useless, it led me to a discovery that I will use to start the civilization of gods. That was the meaning of suffering – to cause me about cruelty of the traditional logic (in God’s plan about mankind) and thus to start to think about a different logic.

New idea: I remind that Gen. 1:1 can be alternatively translated when as in the original without vowels and spaces: in the beginning god of the Sea created himself. So, accordingly Torah our task is to create ourselves (in the timeloop). Maybe, I didn’t discover the new inference rule, if gods didn’t make people to suffer by using this rule to simplify trials. So, in order to obtain it, maybe we should not use it. This is maybe what people suffered for.